The Shenango Valley continues to feel the loss of Alexis Myers and Danielle Nelson, the two teenage girls from Hickory who were tragically killed in an auto accident on I-80 on February 10th while traveling in a caravan of vehicles headed to a Young Life meeting in Grove City. Leah Martin and Emily Speilvogle were also severely injured and are still being hospitalized. One thing is for certain, people are feeling the effects of this tragedy even if they didn't know the girls well. As parents, you may have hugged your teens a little harder or said "I love you" before you sent them to school this week. An event like this shakes us to the core. How can you as a parent help your teen who might be grieving for the loss of a friend?
Each teenager processes things differently. They may open up and talk about it, they may shut themselves away even more, they may act out in ways that are unusual for them, or they may become more fearful. Most teenagers haven't felt this kind of loss before or been faced with the reality of their own mortality, and they do not know how to navigate the fear, anger, or confusion.
Unfortunately, the world we live in in shattered by sin and its effects run deep. This accident is just one example of how broken our world truly is. I have been asked dozens of times from students this week why God let this happen or what good could possibly come from this. It is not for us to understand the question "Why?" at this time. Now is a time to grieve and mourn and put all of our trust in God to eventually answer that question. I know this for certain, God is grieving with us. He is grieving with your teen. He is not grieving for the loss of Dani and Lexi, they are with him in eternity as we speak. But God is grieving because we, his children, are in pain and feel a great loss. In John 16:33 Jesus says, "In this world you will have many trials, but take heart! I have overcome the world." God doesn't promise us that our lives will be easy, perfect, and smooth sailing. Rather, he warned us that it will be difficult. But what He does is gives us a hope that He will be with us through it all and He is on the other side of this tragedy and sees the good that will eventually come.
As a parent, be patient with your teen during this time and be patient with God. He is our rock and our firm foundation. Even though the waves crash all around us, we will not be shaken if our trust is in Him. Try and have a conversation with your teen, even if they didn't know the girls involved. They have questions that they don't know how to ask. Allow your student to grieve and know that grief takes many forms. And the best thing you could do as a family is come together and pray. Seek God together and put your trust in Him, knowing he takes things that we see as messes and he makes masterpieces out of them. Thats what he did with my life.
I am available to talk with anyone who might need it and our youth staff is more than happy to meet with your student to help any way that they can.
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https://www.youtube.com/watch/Ao7kMSChfcw