January Parent Newsletter

It's reported that most Americans either never or only infrequently set New Year's resolutions and of those that do only a few are always successful in keeping them.

So, what if we take a more modest approach this year, setting the "resolutions" bar at a reasonable height? It just might make a difference. With the right attitude going in, the following five "just for today" resolutions can help to get your family's New Year off to a positive start. These are resolutions that most everyone has a good shot of accomplishing -- something that your family can live with. As you succeed, you might even end up incorporating some of them into your family life and identity.

Five Resolutions for the New Year
#1: Just for today, I resolve to create some warmth in my home. Everyone at home wins when we do our part to create a warm and loving atmosphere at home. Today, try some kind words, engage, pay attention (be a good listener), show appropriate physical contact (a kiss, a hug, a touch), encourage, and lighten up.

#2: Just for today, I resolve not to compare myself to anyone else. The temptation always exists, doesn't it? Yet, playing the comparison game is never good for us. We can always find someone who appears to have more, better, or easier. Remember, we always lose when we compare what we know to be true about ourselves with what we don't know for sure about others.

#3: Just for today, I resolve to give someone a choice. Life can begin to weigh us down when we feel we have no choices. Today, lighten someone else's load by finding a way to offer them a choice. Perhaps it's offering your child a choice between several chores around the house. Maybe, it's simply asking your spouse what he or she would like to watch on television this evening.

#4: Just for today, I resolve to prepare. We all have something on the horizon that will benefit from some advance preparation. The time invested in preparation usually pays off when the time to act on that something arrives. Today, look ahead to that future event, deadline, or project and take some time to prepare.

#5: Just for today, I resolve to laugh. It has been said that laughter is the best medicine. But many of us are too busy, live too complicated lives, or are in the midst of painful life situations, which makes laughter a rare occurrence. Just for today, add laughter to your to-do list. Take a few moments to remember a good joke, watch a comedy, or look up a funny video clip online.

The pace of life in today's culture is hectic. It's tough enough for adults to maintain balance. Unfortunately, the danger of kids overdoing it is greater. A rising number of kids are "burning out" because they are simply too busy. Generally, kids love to be involved in activities. But how much is too much?

Wise parents need to be proactive in overseeing their kids' activities, in order to help them learn how to make good decisions and to live balanced lives. Parents should walk alongside them, helping them get involved, while avoiding over commitment.

Here are some ideas for helping kids maintain balance in this area:

Evaluate your child's schedule.
How busy is your kid now? School, homework, athletics, hobbies, and church activities all add up to a significant amount of your child's time.

Consider what activities can be eliminated.
If your children are already living busy lives, and they are motivated to take on even more, help them figure out what current activities and involvements can be cut back.

Teach the lesson that no one can do everything.
There are many involvements and activities worthy of commitment. Help your kids learn that there is such a thing as being overcommitted---even to worthy causes.

Help kids to evaluate potential new activities.
Teach them to evaluate whether new activities will help them grow as a person, how it might affect relationships with their family and friends, and to consider potential positive and negative outcomes from their involvement.

Watch for signs of stress.
Keep an eye on your kids for emerging signs of stress and if you see a pattern of stress emerging, help your son or daughter evaluate the source. If busyness is causing stress, it's time to cut back.

Leave room for other necessities.
A healthy life requires balance and eating the right foods, finding time for relaxation, regular exercise, and getting a good night's sleep are all necessary for kids to avoid "burning out."